Wednesday, January 14, 2015

Should You be a Stay at Home Mom or a Working Mom?

By Nanette
The Sailor's Woman

The Sailor's Woman
Should you be a stay at home mom or one who works outside the home?

Although this is an intensely personal decision, whatever you choose, there will be judgement.  That's the nature of motherhood.  Accept that you can't please everyone and you can focus on what's best for you and your family.

I've been both and there are pros and cons to each.

The biggest plus to staying home with my son was that we were assured of quality childcare.  Who loves your kids more than you do?  No one, that's who!  While you may not have the experience of a trained Early Childhood Educator, a mother's love trumps all.  If you're the primary caregiver, you can also be assured that your children won't be subject to a revolving cast of caregivers as staff move on to bigger and better things.

The flip side of being at home with your little darlings is loneliness and isolation--both for you and them.  We addressed this by enrolling our boy in a co-operative preschool so both he and I got out and met people.  A quality daycare centre provides endless opportunities for socialization so this isn't an issue for working parents.

The Sailor's Woman
Like religion and politics, we're not supposed to discuss money in polite company, but it's another consideration.  Giving up one income and relying on your Sailor's pay cheque is scary stuff.  Being a good parent means providing all those material needs like food, shelter, clothing, electronics, music lessons, sports, travel...  Okay, not all of that is strictly necessary, but fun activities do smooth away life's rough edges.  Be prepared to sacrifice some of those extras once you're no longer a dual income family.

As a working mom who spent a few years at home, I know one thing for sure:  working or stay at home, we're all scrambling to do our best for our kids. 

   
                
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Nanette
The Sailor's Woman
Hi, I’m Nanette.  Like most women, I wear many hats.  I’m a mom, a teacher, a Canadian Naval Officer’s wife, a blogger at The Sailor’s Woman and a novelist.

I have degrees from the University of British Columbia and the University of Moncton. I began writing as a child and I've published many short stories and essays.

In June my husband left for Afghanistan.  Before going overseas he was out of the province for about six weeks training for his adventure.  It’s been a long haul and it’s not over. Field lives on Vancouver Island, British Columbia.


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